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Two Words I’ve Faced My Entire Life That I’m Finally Confronting Today



“No Asians.”

Those two words came back to haunt me at this intersection between AAPI Heritage Month and Pride Month as I watch the increasing violence and mass murders of Asian Americans without end.

I grew up in New York and tried to find my community online. It was a dark place. I was regularly told through messages on gay dating platforms, “Sorry, not for Asians” or the occasional backhand compliment, “Oh, you’re looking for an Asian.” Most noticeable and common, however, were two words that were written openly and predominantly on users’ public profiles: “No Asians”. These words spoke for themselves. I grew up feeling shame on my heritage, race and identity. To just get through life, I normalized this constant racial disapproval. I struggled with dating and relationships, self-care and self-love for years, believing that I was less desirable and sexually non-viable.

Two decades later, AAPI still makes LGBTQ + problems invisible and untouched. A recent study found nearly 3 in 4 AAPI LGBTQ + teenagers who today often feel worthless or hopeless. However, these statistics are not surprising. “No Asians” is a term that is still used in the LGBTQ + community and for the most part remains unchallenged.

Platforms like Grindr and Scruff have completely failed the AAPI community. Not only have they ignored our and other marginalized communities, but they also failed to take any action to suspend racist users. They even introduced and defended profiles by ethnicity. Just recently they agreed to remove their ethnicity filter after the BLM movement last June.

But the damage was done. Every time I saw these words, and every time I had to normalize the constant rejection of my ethnicity within my own LGBTQ + community, it slowly engulfed my own self-esteem and struggle to be proud of my identity as a Sino-American living be in the United States.

Hoa People Chinese

Rejection within our own community is nothing new. We just have to look to my family’s story. My family is ethnically Chinese; My grandparents fled China after the communist revolution and had my parents in Vietnam. My parents were discriminated against, viewed as competition for local jobs and as eternal foreigners. There was even a term for these “other” Chinese: “Hoa 華人”.

When Vietnam fell under communist rule, the Hoa were targeted and my family was confiscated in 1979. Without a home in a country where they were born, they tried to escape by boat. It’s a well-known risky trip: my grandmother’s family boat capsized with all the passengers on board. My parents were among the lucky ones and were eventually accepted to New York as refugees from the Vietnam War. They came here with practically nothing but pain and hope. I am inspired by my parents for their courage, even though their lived experiences had a complicated impact on how I dealt with my intersectional identity.

“Society has taught me to internalize the exemplary minority myth that I already had it well enough here and didn’t have the right to seek help or complain.”

What does it mean to be a gay Asian American?

It means to be taught to be grateful to be born here and to have a roof over your head, which wasn’t a guarantee my parents always had. It means we are taught to “lower our heads and work hard” because in America we can already stand out and be targeted, just like the hoa. It means justifying the obvious racism I face because platforms created to connect with my own community normalized it. It means to justify being objectified and fetishized as “Gayians” because for someone who makes it known that they only like Asians, it is better than “No Asians”, right? And it means burying my feelings because society has taught me to internalize the exemplary minority myth that I already had it well enough here and didn’t have the right to seek help or complain.

I’ve never told anyone how I felt about “No Asians”. Not my friends, my family, my loved ones. Maybe because I normalized it myself. Maybe because it was too painful to unwrap.

The intersectionality of oppression

Even with the ugly history of anti-Asian hatred in the US since the 19th century, our problems are compounded by a historically not so unified AAPI community. The history of borders and wars in Asia and the different experiences of the 50 ethnic groups with AAPIs have made this call to come together in our current crisis difficult. The Asian American experience I grew up with was shared, with unwritten classes within AAPIs due to socioeconomics and politics. That is wrong – and that has to change. We have often focused on what makes us different from what we have in common.

In considering my intersectionality of being gay and Asian, I found a double marginalization in both communities. On the LGBTQ + side, as an Asian, I’ve felt marginalized: I’ve rejected or fetishized my ethnicity by a community (not sure, which is worse) that has struggled for acceptance itself. On the Asian side, my parents’ story with China and Vietnam shows the long-standing divisions in which we double marginalize AAPIs within our own community.

But while both communities have often been victims of oppression, our communities have also been the oppressors. Instead of eradicating the hateful behavior that we tried to escape, we also passed it on to the people around us in our own communities. That also has to change if we really want to stand together against hatred.

“We should examine in our own lives the times when we introduced ethnic or racial filters into friendship, dating, or attitudes – whether explicitly, implicitly, or as a spectator.”

A call to unity and inclusion

For the LGBTQ + community that has been oppressed for years but recently faced challenges in the struggle for equality, I ask you to join us in strengthening queer AAPI organizations like NQAPIA and GAPIMNY and calling out those who are “No Asians “Embody. til today. Let’s set a better example of inclusivity than the parties during COVID. I call on my own community, to which I belong, not to divide us, but to bind these broken people back – to recognize this widespread racism that is not talked about. I urge platforms like Grindr to create features that will filter out racist language (which I know if you invented a racing filter) and no longer ignore those issues that appear on their platforms every day.

For the AAPI community: let’s immerse ourselves in our self-learned divisions, racism and prejudice, learn about our history, learn and unlearn our divisions, and take steps so that we can come together. We are more united and we will not win until we all make progress. We can start fighting for our most marginalized AAPIs and supporting organizations like CAAAV, Red Canary Song and AAJC.

To our community of allies – and to all who have valued or benefited from the Asian people or culture – we open our hearts and offer support to our AAPI colleagues, friends and local businesses at a time of greatest rejection and violence that we have here are exposed at home. As a music manager for over a decade, I ask my colleagues in the $ 720 billion media industry to show us this and put it in your scripts and songs so that we can be caught up in everyday American stories and no longer have to live like eternal foreigners.

The greatest impact we can make is that of the individual. We should examine in our own lives the times when we introduced ethnic or racial filters into friendship, dating, or attitudes – whether explicitly, implicitly, or as a bystander. Include us and stand up for us so that our contributions to American society are protected and our people do not have to die with the door closed. I am here as a proud gay Asian American dreaming of the words that will one day replace the title of this article.

Jason Ve is a music and technology manager and VP at 88rising, the leading record label of the world’s most influential Asian artists. He previously led partnerships at Google and Disney and is a member of the advisory board of Asian Americans Advancing Justice (AAJC), a national not-for-profit organization that advocates for AAPIs.

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Men’s Health

Here’s How Dana White Stays Ripped, Courtesy Of An Outdoor Pool, Weights Room And Infrared Bed



As the UFC President, Dana White has a lot on her plate. From negotiating with the best professional athletes in the sport and their egos to organizing competitions and games held around the world, it’s safe to say that White’s days are busier than most. But if you thought all of these were the perfect (and understandable) excuses for skipping a workout due to time constraints, think again. White is a man who lives and breathes health and wellness. All you need to do is take a tour of his multi-million dollar home in Las Vegas to see that this is a priority for the UFC president, obviously in the outdoor pool with artificial currents, a Pilates room with a floor-to-ceiling TV for group training, massage and massage Face room with infrared LED bed, a room that is exclusively dedicated to lifting heavy weights, and the “cold bath” and steam bath for relaxation.

But when it comes to his actual fitness routine and diet, White isn’t your typical fitness junkie one might expect. He trains a lot and constantly, and his training is tough. But he doesn’t necessarily deprive his kitchen of sugar and processed foods, but lives on weighed portions and green juices that have no taste. Rather, White lives to eat, and his training allows him to do just that. “I’m not one of those guys who eat healthy or whatever” he said in a recent interview with Men’s Health US. “The reason I exercise is because I love food and I like to eat.” And when it comes to exercise, his goals are pretty simple: “I try not to get fat and I try not to get hurt.”

Perhaps that’s what makes white one of the stars that is easier to attribute to when it comes to our own fitness goals. Not every workout has to be a back-breaker, and when it comes to our diet, we should still be able to enjoy food rather than seeing it as an enemy or limiting it to foods that are “good” and “bad” ” are.

When it comes to his fitness routine, White keeps it pretty simple with exercises based on cardio and weights, as he admits, “I’m not trying to break world records.” The routine has changed with age, however, and although he says he used to lift a lot heavier, he has now lost weight after a shoulder injury. As White nears his mid-50s, he had to change his strategy and really see what he wanted to get out of his training. “I’m not doing heavy weights now. I do everything with a light weight and make sure that every movement is perfect – and I do it for repetitions. “

White says that an intense workout for him these days is cardio, but his favorite workout is one he does on Saturdays, where he does what he calls “Circuit Saturday.” As White explains, his training may have changed with age, but it’s still sacred. “I don’t go out as much as I used to, so it’s my quiet time to get to the gym, to get my time together.”

The motivation is of course the food. White does everything for the meal and his meals are pretty outrageous. On a tour of his gym and fridge, he revealed that he has a lot of sugar in the kitchen, with things like Klondike bars, frozen Snickers, frozen kit-kats, several pints of Ben & Jerry’s, powdered donuts, and Pepperidge Farm everything available . However, he does have a refrigerator devoted exclusively to healthy options, with fruits and vegetables available and pre-cut to make snacking easier.

“For breakfast, I usually either make scrambled eggs and sausages or I like breakfast rolls.” What White doesn’t like is that he doesn’t eat garlic, onions and seafood. Ultimately, however, every day is a cheat day for White who says his ultimate cheat day menu is a raised donut with a piece of fried chicken in the middle with a special sauce. Cant say it sounds particularly appetizing, but according to White, if you like chicken and donuts, it’s the best you’ll ever eat.

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Men’s Health

Mojo, a men’s sexual health startup that’s pushing therapy not pills, gets $4.4M seed – TechCrunch



In the past few years, a number of sexual health startups have sprung up to offer men discreet help with the uncomfortable problem of erectile dysfunction. Companies like Numan and Roman. But “help” in this context usually means getting medicines like Viagra more easily.

The British startup Mojo is taking a different approach. A subscription service has been developed to support men’s sexual wellbeing by providing direct access to specialized therapies – in collaboration with professional psychotherapists to offer online courses that are considered a longer-term solution to male sexual health problems, rather than just some too popping blue pills.

This approach means that Mojo is within a broader digital health trend where the smartphone in the pocket of app makers is used to provide targeted, non-pharmaceutical support – be it for insomnia, dietary needs, musculoskeletal disorders, mental health or even sexual wellbeing. Being. (The latter category also includes specific apps for women.)

The idea behind all of these startups is to offer people a viable alternative to big pharma. (And hopefully eat some of the pharmaceutical company lunch at the same time.)

Mojo’s support platform caters to a spectrum of problems that can affect men and have links to their sexual wellbeing – with digital programs that target not only erectile dysfunction but other sexual problems like porn addiction or anxiety in general are.

So it could be an interesting “start” – encouraging men to explore broader psychological problems by using support services. (Men are a notoriously difficult group to get into therapy, but erectile dysfunction is likely a trigger for many therapy-shy individuals to seek support.)

Mojo’s quarterly subscription service (costs £ 49 / $ 68 every three months) provides access to professional resources that Mojo describes as “out of the reach of the most”. It also describes its app as a “virtual coach” – with the aim of “encouraging men to get their erections back and have great sex without resorting to a drug approach”.

The digital support package includes video courses and exercises, therapy podcasts and meditations, and live events – including the ability to connect directly with Mojo’s expert panel on sexual health and the wider community of men who use the app. An engaged community reduces the stigma men can feel when discussing intimate health issues – since other users are likely to have similar issues.

The startup, which was founded in 2019, claims to have registered “almost” 50,000 users in 36 countries.

It announces seed funding today to step on the growth gas.

The £ 3.25 million ($ 4.4 million) round is jointly led by London-based early-stage fund Kindred Capital and Octopus Ventures. The angel investors in the round include some well-known names from the European startup world, including Tom Blomfield (Monzo), Julien Callede (, Ian Hogarth (SongKick), Freddy Macnamara (Cuvva), Alex Rose (Let’s Do This) and Errol Damelin (Wonga).

Kamran Adle, health investor at Octopus Ventures, commented on the seed funding in a statement:

Taboo topics in the health sector are still a central issue for us, as there is often a high latent demand due to decades of underinvestment. Men’s sexual health is a perfect example of this and offers Mojo a great opportunity to challenge the stigma and move beyond pills to a much broader, sustainable and scalable solution.

In another supportive statement, Maria Palma, General Partner at Kindred, added:

We firmly believe that Mojo’s strong founding team can redefine the conversation about male sexuality and vulnerability. It is clear from their early evangelical user base that they have created a product that will resonate with men around the world and help them transform their confidence, relationships, and everyday lives.

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Men’s Health

The Inchworm Exercise Is an Effective Abs and Hamstrings Move



If you’ve ever played a sport – even if it was just youth soccer or a leisure club – you’ve likely gone through a series of warm-up exercises that included a movement called inchworm. The maneuver is accessible to all types of people (including wild kids), and it’s even more effective than you might have guessed if you kept moving through the moves before your workout or competition. The key to getting the most out of the exercise is to focus on every single detail.

For Men’s Health Fitness Director Ebenezer Samuel, CSCS, the inchworm is a great opportunity to work out your abs in ways that go beyond your typical crunch-to-static plank combo. “Every now and then you need a different kind of core movement,” he says. “Not a move that will make you tired or make your abs feel fried, but a move that will help your abs feel great, that will help you challenge a bit of stability, that will and will help warm your core Might challenge your multiplanar stability a little more than you might think. ” Along with the benefits to your core, you’ll also move more than other static stretches and stretch your hamstrings more than you might expect.

Those are some of the advantages of such a seemingly basic exercise – not to mention that you can do this exercise almost anywhere without the need for equipment. Just find enough space to take a plank position and you’re good to go.

Men health

Before you recreate the inchworm of your youth, however, take a moment to learn the subtle keys of exercise from Samuel and Men’s Health Fitness Editor, Brett Williams. This is how you get more out of your training.

How to do the inchworm

Keep your legs straight – until you can no longer

To get the nice hamstring stretch that we are looking for at the beginning of the exercise, you need to keep your legs straight. Start with your feet just over shoulder width apart, then hang from your hips to bend down and place your hands on the floor. As you descend, you want to keep your legs as straight as possible – but for some people, this means bending your knees. That’s a good thing. Everyone has a different level of flexibility.

But the goal is to give up the squat. “You want to get as far as keeping your legs as straight as possible because the straighter you keep them, the more you’re going to get that really good hamstring stretch,” says Samuel.

Go slow it down

The inching to which the name of the move refers is created when you move from a stooped position onto the plank by moving your hands forward. This is where most of the benefits come from. But you don’t want to rush it or you’ll throw yourself off balance. Go slow

“This is the part where you can explore your core a little and explore the stability of the core,” says Samuel. However, it’s important to make sure the raised rump remains stable when you put one hand in front of the other. “I think about the hips and shoulders on the floor all the time,” he continues.



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Own your pushups

Once you’ve brought your hands to the end point, your focus shouldn’t let up. Now is your chance to get even more benefit from the exercise. When you’re in this spot, you’re essentially holding a plank.

As with a regular plank, there are a few things you can do to make the static position a great core move. First, be sure to keep your spine straight without rounding your back or squeezing your pelvis. Second, make sure you contract your glutes, core, and shoulders by squeezing these muscles.

Get it right up

Getting back to the starting position shouldn’t be as easy as just getting up. Instead, you should keep the focus until you get to the top.

“Let’s take the opportunity when we get up to use this as a chance to get your hips in proper extension,” says Samuel. “We’re essentially coming back from a Romanian deadlift.” Squeeze your glutes while standing, keeping your hips and shoulders straight, and stepping back with your hands.

Do you want to master even more moves? Check out our entire Form Check series.

Brett Williams, fitness editor for Men’s Health, is a NASM CPT certified trainer and former professional football player and tech reporter who divides his exercise time between strength and conditioning, martial arts, and running.

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